NOTES: Takes place right after the end of a movie. As usual, the shounen-ai relationship with the narrator is completely fictional. Non-canon. Made up. They would be cute together though.

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He doesn't love me.

I tried to win him. I tried so hard. I wanted it so badly. But in the end, it just wasn't enough. I wasn't good enough.

He's in love with his ex-wife. Always has been. He didn't love me at all when we were together before he met her, he didn't love me the brief time we were together while they were broken up, and he doesn't love me now, when they're back together.

I shouldn't think so much of a few times sleeping together, I guess. He needed someone at the time, I wanted him, we got along well enough. So what if we're business partners? I may have accused him of mixing business and pleasure, but it all turned out well enough when he did it.

But what do I do now?

They're back together. That leaves me with what? Am I supposed to sit around and watch while they're together? Am I simply supposed to turn my head when they kiss and pretend that I didn't see it?

And what if he has to call the team back together again for some reason? Then what? They'd all of them know in an instant how I felt. I'm surprised they don't know from what they've seen already.

The kid does, maybe. I can't tell, he's not exactly the most social being on Earth (though he has improved since the job). He strikes me as the type that notices things though. I can't believe that he wouldn't see it.

But I can't leave him. We're connected, much as neither one of us likes to admit. I love him, and he's... well... tied to me. I'm a good partner, and good for sex when he's alone. Part of why his wife left him, as a matter of fact. Found out about his former dalliences with me. That's the word she used. Dalliences. Yeesh. I don't know what he sees in her.

Oh yeah. Breasts.

Anyway, it's not as though I ever had a chance. I just feel kind of cheated sometimes, knowing that so much of what I poured into the relationship was wasted. Knowing that he always had eyes only for her. But can you blame me if I don't take high odds seriously? We've triumphed over them before. So why not this time?

Somehow, I think this time maybe I'll lose.